This Weeks Playlist

Nope, I haven't forgotten about my 'weekly playlist'.

Playlist (December 31st-January 6th)

1. Feeling A Moment - Feeder
2. I Predict A Riot - Kaiser Chiefs
3. So Happy I Could Die - Lady GaGa
4. Alejandro - Lady GaGa
5. Good Vibrations - Gym Class Heroes
6. November Rain - Guns 'n Roses
7. Some Say - Sum 41
8. Pass Out - Chris Brown
9. Never Say Never - Chris Brown
10. Secret Crowds - Angels & Airwaves

:)

Merry Christmas!

Okay it's sort of late... here it's 2:15 AM, I'm sorry! But Merry Christmas to everyone!

Tomorrow Carlie and I are flying to Hemet California to visit aunts, uncles, and my cousin Rachel- hm... I wonder if I'll see a certain... 'Scott' boy? Ha, that'd be cool. My lucky cousin GREW UP in Hemet and her mom is friends with James' mom or something- I'm not all that close with my aunt for certain reasons this is just what my cousin told me and she went to school with James Lafferty, lucky whore haha. ;)

Hope everyone had an amazing Christmas<3

love
jess

Weekly Playlist?

For some reason I love sharing my favourite music so maybe once a week I'll share my playlist... the music won't be in any specific genre or new or old, it will just be any music I like... lol.

Playlist (Dec. 23rd-Dec. 30)

1. What Are You Afraid Of - West Indian Girl
2. Dreamer - Uh Huh Her
3. Lovesong - The Cure
4. Ruby - Kaiser Chiefs
5. Relax, Take It Easy - Mika
6. War Sweater - Wakey!Wakey!
7. Overcome - Better Than Ezra
8. Cherry Bomb - The Runaways
9. Apologies - Grace Potter and The Nocturnals
10. I Want Something That I Want - Grace Potter & Bethany Joy Galeotti

:)

New Facebook Privacy Settings

I really hate the new privacy settings for Facebook! We have absolutely NO PRIVACY ANYMORE. That's not right, especially for those 11 and 12 year olds who have secret accounts and would rather not be stalked by creepy 40 year olds... LMFAO random, I know I know.

I'd just like to say that as much as I love everyone, I'm not accepting any requests. It's nothing personal, but it's a personal choice, sorry!

xo
Jess

It's Been Awhile

I completely forgot about my own blog, I'm sorry. It's been kind of hectic, the whole traveling between Jacksonville and Los Angeles and a little bit of New York, I'm traveling as much as I'm allowed before I'm not allowed at all. When I'm six or seven months pregnant my mother wants me to come stay with her in Jacksonville until my baby girl/boy is like one or two, something like that. It's all so crazy and confusing.

Baby, is healthy, I, am healthyish, I've got a slight December cold but hopefully that clears up soon. Christmas is in 19 days, I can't believe it! I'll definitely be in Jacksonville. I'm like five months pregnant now, it's kind of crazy. Four and a half or five months... honestly I've lost count. I think my doctor would know. I think.

Anyway hope everyone is alright.

xo
Jess

PS: Still can't get on to this account [Jessica Mayfield (Jessica Riley-Dawn Mayfield)] I think that's the name for the account... LMFAO.

Add My Account

Hello everybody!

I remembered I had this account http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#/profile.php?id=100000028873364&ref=profile so go ahead and add it! It's completely open. I'm not on it as much as my private account, but it's better than nothing, right? Right? ;)

-Jess

Swine Flu

So I've been feeling pretty shitty the last few days so I finally went to a doctor today. I was supposed to be leaving for Los Angeles tonight but things have changed. I got tested and I have Swine Flu, so now I'm on this Tamiflu shit and the doctor said not to go home until I'm a lot better, which really sucks because I was hoping to get back to California tonight. So I'm stuck in Vancouver until I'm better, which sucks because I'll be feeling shitty for a long time. So I've canceled my flights, canceled my photo shoot for tomorrow and I've canceled a lot of things. Swine Flu seriously sucks, guys. The good news is, is that my baby will be fine as long as I'm fine! So lets hope I don't die.
I was going to get a Swine Flu immunization today but they said not to until I'm feeling better, which seriously sucks. It doesn't really matter though if I already have it... basically all I've been doing is chilling out and watching television, and going on Facebook of course. I'm trying to get back into my other account 'Jessica Mayfield' but when I try to enter the password it says 'Incorrect Password' even though I look back onto my e-mails where it says that password so it's totally gay. I've tried e-mailing it to myself and everything, but then it just says "You have to log-in first," when I enter the password it e-mails to me... so fucked up. So the only way I can use this account is by updating my blog because it's set up to that account.

Anyway that's really all, have a nice week and try not to get Swine Flu...

-Jess

I Totally Forgot To Mention

That I'm engaged! Wow, that's killer how could I forget? A few days ago, my lovely boyfriend now fiance proposed, and I said yes! We haven't set a date yet, but we're aiming for sometime maybe Summer 2010, when I'm not pregnant! He doesn't have to adopt the baby because I'm pretty sure he's the father, anyway. Around when I would have gotten pregnant was when we were together and I never cheated on him or anything, so I'm 99.9% sure he's the father, or else I'm a slut :/

-Jess

So We Meet Again, Vancouver

I arrived in Vancouver about 40 minutes ago, I'm currently at my hotel, and enjoying every second of it! Even though the weather is currently crappy, I'm still in love with Vancouver, and who know's maybe I'll live here some day. Most people (well, from California) say I'm crazy but for some reason I absolutely love Vancouver! It has everything I need! If I moved here I'd move to West Vancouver, it's gorgeous there.

Oh another great part about Vancouver, well most parts of Canada actually, everyone's so friendly! It's amazing.

Have a nice weekend!

-Jess

Update

Okay just thought I'd mention that my account is still here but... now it's private. Don't take it personally, please... I decided only to keep people that I knew because it was easier, no offense. It was a personal decision, and I feel badly for it but like I said it's just easier. Sorry!

-Jess

Story of the Day

Just thought I'd share an old-school Jess Mayfield story, you know? This one is one of my personal favorite's, I've got to admit.

So... one time in Jacksonville when I was 17, my boyfriend threw this massive party at his house. Hundreds of people showed up and we were all drinking and drunk, having a great time. My friends and I were hanging out, drinking, I think I had like honestly 6 shots of Vodka and Tequila that night, and like 6 beers I was wrecked. So at one point my friend Kate and I were talking, then my boyfriend came and she left... so yeah my boyfriend were drunkly discussing things and making out, and then his ass-of-a-father who reminds me of Dan Scott, showed up.

He of course "busted us" for under age drinking, and this is how it went. "Underage drinking, huh?" he said, he looked evil.
"Go away, Dad." my boyfriend said, he was giving his dad a "what are you gonna do about it" face, it was hilarious. Then I started feeling really sick really fast, I felt terrible.. like super duper terrible. Then I said "Uh oh,"
and his ass-of-a-father goes "Yeah, 'uh oh' you're busted." and then I threw up ALL OVER THE DAD! My boyfriend was pissing himself laughing, and that dad's just like "What the HELL!" haha.

So then my friend had thrown up too so we went swimming... lol I know that's random.

:)

-J

I'm In Vancouver, Bitch

Yes, I am. Okay well tomorrow my friend Caitie is coming too, awesome! Anyway this is super short since I'm going to bed soon since i'm going to set with my wife ashley tomorrow, we're getting up at 4 in the fucking morning! ahhh! g'nite sexypeople.

xoxo

Hi

I haven't updated this thing forever... anyway here's what happened.

1. I Got Pregnant
2. I decided to keep the baby
3. I went to Jacksonville
4. I went to Wilmington, North Carolina to meet family friends with my mom, brother, and sisters
5. I met James Lafferty again :P
6. I went home

There you go... quick update!!!

xoxo

This Disgusts Me

Jon Gosselin, who parties with those 19 year old girls. He's what, 34? He disgusts me. And his girlfriend, Hailey Glassman. Sure it's love but she was um busted for POT, (drugs if you didn't know that, Jon.) and he has 8 young kids, plus she's only 22. Would she be a good step mom for 8 young children, I don't think so. I WOULDN'T BE EITHER, it's sad that me and Hailey are the same age, that is quite weird to me.

Also I just think Jon is just an asshole, I mean seriously. TEAM KATE, I mean she's bitchy sometimes but I don't blame her, with Jon as a husband? I'd be super bitchy too. But she has her nice and good moments, I mean aw she started tearing up on TV!

Anyway just sayin', I hate Jon Gosselin.

xoxo
Jess

In A Relationship

Guess what? After awhile of being single, I am no longer single! (If that makes sense...) My then ex-boyfriend Jake and I have gotten back together just today, and I'm soo happy. Things are working out, I'm pretty sure.

Basically what I'm telling myself is this. "If he fucks with me then I'll fuck him up," and no exceptions. There we go, sound reasonable? He was the dumper last time, but our phone conversation today was so sweet, he has one more shot with me. :)

xoxo
Jess

This Is Where I Am

View of West Vancouver

True fact, this is where I am. Well somewhere in that city, this picture is from when I went hiking in Vancouver awhile ago. Carlie used to live in downtown Vancouver but recently moved to West Vancouver, I love West Vancouver... ha ha.

xoxo
Jess

After Another Epic Fail, I'm Back Bitches

It's been like ten days since my last blog post... but whatever. In those ten days I've been in France, Los Angeles, and Savannah! France was amazing of course, Los Angeles was/is normal, and I went to Savannah and met up with Miley. Now, I am in Vancouver... right now not for Eclipse, for my sister Carlie... poor girl. She had a boyfriend of 4 years, and he left her for some other girl. She's heartbroken, we're eating ice cream and watching TV and doing random things. We're probably going to head downtown Vancouver and S H O P! It always makes us Mayfield girls feel better. The best thing is Lily and Courtney are coming to Vancouver sometime today too!

I got here like early, and had the worst sleep at my house... my two cats and dog were fighting, so annoying. "Meooow hiss rooof!" and then there's me "SHUT THE FUCK UP!" because I'm so nice to my pets verbally. I think I'm going to go insane of Carlie's cat fights with itself tonight, I'll be sleeping in the bathtub or something. Reminds me of one time when Me, Carlie, Courtney, and my mom went on vacation to Seattle... Carlie had this really bad cough and I couldn't fall asleep one time so I went into the bathroom and went in the bathtub to sleep. The next night my mom had a cough too, and I would have been 14 then. Their coughs weren't in sync, so my mom would cough then Carlie, then I'd slam my fist down on the bed and whisper loudly "Fuck!" ha ha. Finally I picked up Carlie and threw her in the bath tub, good memories.

I'm still single, boo me. I need to find someone REALLY hot and REALLY worth it, because I am lonely. ):

Anyway I think I'll blog more now. (:

xoxo
Jess

Epic Fail

Honestly I thought I'd only update this thing once, and then never touch it again. Obviously that didn't happen, I "used to" update this thing a lot. I failed to update it for 10 days though, leaving it draining away in my lonely thoughts. That's unfortunate, but whatever. I call it an epic fail, I got this far and ruined my lets call it "record".

Right now, I'm on my way to Paris, France everybody. I'm on my private jet (so fancy, I know.) and I'll be in Paris in thirty two minutes, how exciting. After Paris I'm heading to London to work & relax a little bit, have some fun there with some cute British boys, oh la la. Seriously, there are some boys there that honestly I mind rape, they're are fiiinnee.

Others, aren't the most attractive people on earth. Don't worry, non of you know who I'm talking about. (:

Anyway yesterday I went to Vancouver with Jenna and we met up with Carlie & friends. It was really sunny outside and everything and around 6:00 we went for dinner at The Boathouse. Around 7:00, well before that, it started pouring rain. We were like "What the hell?" and I was driving. Later it started really pouring, & there was thunder & lightening! I had NEVER seen anything like it, except when I had been in Texas as a kid.

The highlight of the night was seeing someone attached to an IV (coming from Vancouver General Hospital apparently,) walking around. We guessed he was buying cigarettes somewhere because you can't buy them in the hospital. Well, tough chance of buying smokes when you're wearing a hospital gown and you have an IV thing attached to you... umm...?

So Carlie lives in West Vancouver so around 9:00 we finally headed home after watching the storm carry on. I was freaking out driving back because the sky was orange 'n shit, we thought we were in a Stephen King novel. I drove way faster than usual (meaning I drove REALLY REALLY fast,) because I thought that way the lightening wouldn't hit us. Ha ha.

When we got home the POWER WAS OUT, God damn. Thank God for phones & laptops, I could keep us entertained. After awhile we went to our friends house with power, and hung out 'n stuff. Then around 11:00 or 12:00 the power finally came back on and we went home, to find a house full of boys. (Carlie lives with her boyfriend.). They were playing video games and they had been in Horseshoe Bay park standing under a tree drinking.Come on, I know I'm smarter than that.

The funny thing was, the next morning we read the news and four people had been struck by lightening from standing under a tree. Hilarious, really.

Anyway just updating.

xoxo
Jess

It's Been Two Days

Yeah, sorry about that. Yesterday I was busy well... Facebooking and throwing up I guess... sorry if that's too much information but I've been sick the past couple of days... my friend had the stomach flu and then I caught it and well yeah. Today I've been busy swimming and exploring, earlier today I went swimming, and I stayed in the ocean with my nieces nephews, brothers, and sisters for five hours no joke.

I love those nieces and nephews of mine, and my siblings. They keep me old. Well, not really but whatever I just felt like saying that because it's 12:32 AM and I'm hella bored! I've been staying awake really late this week and with an exception of two nights getting my drink on. Oh yes, right now I'm on my laptop drinking and soon I'm heading out, how awesome AM I? Very very very awesome, you don't even know. Haha

I'm listening to I Know You Want Me (Calle Ocho) because it's my favorite song right now, don't comment... lol. This whole "blogging" think is fun, honestly I thought I'd do it once but give up but I almost at least 5 times a week, not bad eh?

Europe, well I have no clue when I'm going... but I'm still going, but only to France I think. I have other... um plans. (:

xoxo
Jess

One Day

I realized today... that one day when I'm ready, I've love to have a baby. It freaked me out when I wasn't ready and had two miscarriages, but today I started thinking, that in the next 10 years, maybe 11 or something, I'd love to have a baby. First of all I have to have a steady relationship though, or else I'm really screwed. Then, I have to be ready to stop the drinking partying, I mean I can still party, just not as hardcore.

It sounds crazy and stupid, but the truth is I adore kids, I adore my nieces and nephews. I do know how to change diapers and all that stuff, I'm not that dumb ha ha. Of course they get annoying when they're screaming and whining and crying, but otherwise they're the cutest things ever and I love them.

I know it sounds stupid, but I think way ahead of things, literally.

xoxo
Jess

I'm Home

After a long flight from London England to Los Angeles California, I'm home safe in my own environment. Today has been interesting, but I'm glad to be home. Basically what happened today, is I came home, looked at my living room, and cried. I cried because I have pictures of my family everywhere around my house, because I love my family so much. It hurt, to see all those pictures of my brother and my dad.

Then I got over it and drank some RedBull for an energy boost, just because it was 6:00 AM and I felt like it. I walked around my house, swam in my pool, and ate some healthy breakfast, really I mean it when I say healthy. I played RockBand 2 with my sister for a little bit, that was fun and entertaining, especially when I kept getting higher scores than her. :) To your surprise, I am actually a good singer, oh yes.

Then, I was itching to go on Facebook so of course I did... spent an hour or two on it, and then I finally logged off and started to pack for Dominican Republic (It's in the Carribean, I think.) and then around 10:30 AM, I went into my sister Amanda's room and found her drinking (She's 17, by the way. You can add her, Amandaa Maayfiieeld) out of the bottle. I officially had to lock up my homebar, that was depressing.

Then I came back on Facebook, then logged off again... and I moped around being all "depressed" and sad, which is not fun. I need to keep myself occupied or else it will most definitely happen, and it sucks.

xoxo
Jess

**Update**

I haven't mentioned in my blog yet that my father has passed away as of yesterday, and so that's why I am home in Los Angeles, just in case some of you didn't know. xoxo

A Lot Can Happen In A Few Days....

So, I was roaming around my house on July 8th just in the morning being me, and then I get a phone call from my mom. "Jess Jess Jess! Your Dad was in London, he was in a car crash. Jess he's not doing well! He's in critical condition!" she was crying to me on the phone. She warned me not to go to the hospital yet, so I obeyed. Then I went to the mall with my sister Amanda, and I get a call from the bank, and my credit card has been stolen because they asked me if I bought certain items, and I knew I had shopping issues, but I didn't buy those types of things. So, I kept shopping anyway thinking "Am I going to be broke tomorrow?". Then, I came home and basically went "mental" as my brother called it, and started drinking... I had three drinks and then I was shitwrecked. My brother stopped me, and thank God I wasn't drunk in the next hour.

The next day I went to Chicago, but before I left I sadly canceled my credit card, I wasn't going to let some random stranger keep using it! I went, and got there around 2:00 Chicago time. I took a nap, and remembered that I was picking up Dani from the train station at 3:00. Well I slept a little overtime, and my alarm clock went off, but I obviously didn't hear it. Unfortunately, I never got a chance to meet up with Dani, which makes me very sad. I even got a new phone just for Chicago, how crazy am I?

Then, that night, I got a call from my mom. She told me that it was time to come to London and see my dad, because he'd gotten worse, and he's not awaking. So at around 10:30 last night, I caught an eight hour flight to London, England, which is where I am now. I'm actually sitting in a hospital waiting room, which is very unpleasant, I hate hospitals a lot. My whole family is here basically, minus Amanda. We're all comforting each other, and going in with our mom one at a time, because we're a family of 7 at the moment, it's a little too many people.

Just thought I'd do an update, because I haven't update my blog in three days! I broke my promise, whoops. I'll still be updating Facebook, just because.

xoxo
Jess

Needs Some Sleep

That's all. Goodnight.

Boredom Sucks

Hasn't anyone noticed that everyday, even if you're a busy person, you're freakin' bored? I definitely have, and it sucks, let me tell you that. The good thing is, is that I am leaving in two days for Chicago to see Dani [awesomness,] but that bad news is, what do I do until then??

I'm already packed, except for stuff I'll need... and well yeah I think I've watched every TV show & movie I own today, not really, but whatever. FTR: I love Zack and Miri Make A Porno, and I love Seth Rogen, marry me?

I'm bored. God help me.

xoxo
Jess

We always ignore the ones who adore us, and adore the ones who ignore us

Can anybody relate? I can. It happens all the time with me, which is why my relationships probably suck balls. It happens every time. For example.

In high school, I spent all this time adoring someone who didn't like me, and it was pretty much what you see in those movies what happen, I would be like "Hi," and all flirty. Then there was a friend of mine who was a guy, who I basically ignored because I didn't like him, I liked the other popular, jock guy.

Well the one day he tries to talk to me, tries to tell him he "loves me" but then I keep pushing him out of the way whenever this guy comes around, to make him actually for once notice me.

Then what happened, is that jock finally noticed me, but took advantage of me... you know what's coming. He takes me to one of those big parties with alcohol and drugs, and gets wasted, and tries to pull me in bed. Then I finally realized, it wasn't him... he was a jerk and a loser! This was graduating year, so I was 17 or 16.

I had to walk home, and I was scared shitless because I lied to my parents, and now I smelled like pot & alcohol. So I went home, and collapsed onto my mom in her arms pretty much, and I told her the truth. I felt like I was dying that night, I was tricked, and the guy didn't even like me, he was trying to use me for sex.

The next morning, I walked over to the guys house, but he'd moved on from me, he had a girlfriend, one of my friends. I waited too long, I pushed him away.

This happens, all the time. I'm trying to say something here. Don't love someone who doesn't love you the same way back, love someone who can give you back the love you're giving.

xoxo
Jess

PS: Like I said, birthday's make me think a lot. I thought about this yesterday, and never posted it. Now I'm bored, and decided to post it... I don't know. <3

Do you guys know what this is? THIS my friends is a yearbook class photo picture, which I wish to say that "You can't find it anywhere else," but sadly, it's been leaked onto the internet. I'll update this later, with an arrow pointing to me, and an arrow pointing to Ashley, we're both in here, but we're not beside each other.

You'll probably find her anyway before I have to point it out with a circle around our heads, but I'm bored right now, and officially 22 so I just feel like doing whatever the hell I want, you know?

NO STEALING, take a look.

=]

xoxo
Jess

New Dog

I Need Some Suggestions!

I need to get Budda a "playmate" in hopes that he won't chew my shoes anymore... any suggestions on what type of dog to get? I'm totally clueless, so I'm definitely in need of some extreme help. Budda's pissing me off with all of his shoe chewing & clothes barfing, so really I' in desperate need here.

Budda's very friendly with all types of dogs, thank God. He hates the cats, so they're not distracting Budda from any chewing or anything... that mega sucks. Really, it does.

THANK YOU.

xoxo
Jess

Guess What

I have yet some more good news, that I think just has to be shared. After a few years of great modeling, I'll be in a magazine, I just got the call today from my boss! I'm not quite sure which one yet, it'll be a good one, for definite. Elite Model Management's only the best. Well I've been in magazines before, but nothing like the great ones... only little ad's in People 'n shit.

I know it will be fancy, formal, & awesome. I'm so effing excited! I'm doing the modeling shoot in France, and it'll be with some of my "fellow models" as I like to say. A.K.A, my sisters. I have tons of sisters, craziness right? Anyway, so far this has been the best birthday ever for me, like really.

I'll keep you posted with information, and tell you what magazine! I've been in ad's for Gucci and Vera Wang, but never in magazines!!!

xoxo
Jess

My Birthday

Why Hello, didn't see you there. [Ew, sounds weird.]

My birthday, is going fanfuckingtabulous. Just letting you all know. I've been chillaxing, well up until a few hours ago when my 8 siblings arrived... shit they're annoying, but whatever, isn't that what siblings are for? They're all staying at my house, even the ones who live in California, shitty for me... but whatever.

News news news: I'm meeting Anna Wintour again, and she said this to me today:

"Oh Jessica! Can I tell you how many times a dog's chewed my shoes? You'll be getting another pair of exclusive, rare, Gucci heals from me." xoxoAnna

In an e-mail! So fucking fantabulous! I love that woman... amazing how nice & kind she is... lmao. I'm so happy, the lil' bitch Budda's doin Jessi some good yo!

xoxo
Jess

I Am Very Pissed At This Son of a Bitch

I came back from a run today, and I saw black leather bits all over my carpet... so I follow the trail, and to my surprise there's the little shit [my dog, Budda] eating away at my exclusive and rare expensive Gucci heals! I would say "Whatever, I'll buy another pair." but I can't, they were given to me exclusively by Anna Wintour in Paris after a runway appearance! Sucks, right?

I said to the son of a bitch [since bitches are female dogs, it's not appropriate to call him just a 'bitch'.] "Thanks for the birthday present," and laughed at him. It sucks, I was kind of supposed to bring those back to Paris later this month, not to give back, to show Anna that I still wore them... you know this sucks big time, but whatever... I'll find some similar pair or something.

My dog is the bitchiest person you'll ever meet- as anyone, Cami, Ashley, anyone who's met that little bitch.

xoxo
Jess

PS: I'm not an animal hater, I very much love my dog, Budda, along with my two cat's Buddy and Jasmine... but sometimes they piss me off. I promise, and swear on my life, that I'm not an animal abuser.
<3

It's My Birthday! Good Morning

I'm in hell right now, I'm so hungover! Last night at around 12AM, Cami and I went clubbing, and let me tell you, that's the most wasted I've been in awhile. So technically it was the started of my birthday, yes!

Today, I, Jessica Mayfield, am turning 22 years young, not old. You're not old if you can laugh. Which I do almost every moment, like right now... :] It's not technically my birthday, because I wasn't born until 8:29PM, oh yes, I know what time I was born... in Miami Florida, July 6th 1987 my mother and father welcomed me into their family, which was already fucking huge! My mom & dad would have been... oh I guess 22? They started their family so young it was craziness, but whatever.

So, happy birthday to anyone else who's blowing their candles today, and if you are, you're really awesome.

Happy birthday ME!

xoxo
Jess

Just A Heads Up

Just a forewarning, but while I'm in Europe there are no promises that I'll be on Facebook too much. I'm considering have a "No Facebook" rule while I'm traveling, on only updating my blog and checking my e-mails. Just a little decision I'm thinking about, just because I feel like "trying something new" which might be healthy for me, who knows!

I promise to update my blog every single day, and answer my e-mails, no doubt. Once again, I have two e-mails that I frequently use, one for Hotmail, well MSN, and the other for just e-mailing, which is Gmail.

MSN: yourstruly.theheartlessbich@hotmail.com [No promises to whether I'll be on MSN that much, just because I'll be "on the move" a lot.]

E-mailing yourspersonaljaxcutie@gmail.com [Do you like my spelling error? That was not on purpose, stupid me!]

Don't be shy, e-mail me for Christ' sakes! ;]

I'll still be social, it's not like I'm burrying myself into a deep black hole or anything, I'm just taking a short break from Facebook, and updating my adventures on my blog here... or maybe I'll even create a new blog, just for Europe!

I'm also considering a trial of no Facebook while I'm visiting Dani in Chicago, just to see how it goes and if I'm "prepared" to say goodbye to Facebook for a month and a bit!

For all of you who are reading my blog off of Facebook, the link to my blog is http://www.itsjessiibitch.blogspot.com/ because I'm also considering deleting my account while it's not in use, but don't worry I can bring it back when I want it back, I promise. Also, get your lazy asses off of Facebook, and actually go to the REAL blog!! ;]

xoxo
Jess

**UPDATE**
Forgot to mention that I will be updating my Twitter! Completely forgot about ol' Twitter here. It's good, because all I want to do is update. See, you'll all still be informed, it's all cool.

The hardest thing to do is watch the one you love, love someone else

That's my feeling today, it really is. Otherwise I'm great, and happy, but that's taking over me this moment. I'm sure people have had this feeling before, you love someone who's taken? Well, that's sort of me I guess, I'm confused. It's actually my ex-boyfriend, who I'm of course still in love with, and he's moved on, after a week... got a new girlfriend, I saw them holding hands today went I went to Starbucks, so disgusting.

Jake was nice, really nice, but he called it off because of "business". Apparently this girl works with him, so I understand I guess... at least I never saw this when we were going out. I waved, and it was hilarious, their faces both went red! He looked like he was sorry, so I think he's actually a great guy, he just needed someone different.

It's understandable, of course nobody wants the neighborhood whore.

xoxo
Jess

Congratulations, Dana Reed!

Congratulations to my sister in law, Dana who just had a healthy baby girl 19 minutes ago in Miami, Florida! The baby is three days early, and 7 pounds! Really healthy! I'm an aunt to a fourth kid... ew that makes me sound old.

Oh yeah, congratulations to you too, shit face (brother,) for having another baby... for knocking up your wife again. Ever heard of birth control... OR CONDOMS!!??
=)

xoxo
Jess

HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY

Oh yes, Happy Fourth of July... completely forgot the whole reason of why I'm at Cami's. Her mom is cooking her family (including me,) a Brazilian dinner, then we're going to see fireworks I think.

Then, her sweetie pie hunny bunch, Joe might fly here to see her. Aw<3

Anyway, bye!

xoxo
Jess

Silly Silly Camilla

Camilla thinks I'm like... totally obsessed with Nick Jonas because I was joking around about how he's pretty "cute".Honestly, I'm not a pedophile, REALLY! =)

Sorry that your soon to be sister in law is such a wack job, Nick.

xoxo
Jess

PS: I'm at Cam's, and we're so lame. <3

R,I.P

It's been a really sad week knowing that two beloved celebrities, Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett have passed away, both due to health conditions. I hope they're doing good in heaven... and well yeah.

In tribute to Michael Jackson, I changed my Facebook name (mainly as a joke, but still.) to Billie Jean, one of his hit songs. Also, I've been listening to his music like mad, and replaying my favorite songs over and over and over again.

My favorite songs are most definitely Billie Jean, Beat It, Thriller, Rock My World, Black and White, and Smooth Criminal. He has so many songs, that it's hard to remember them all, but those are the ones I know off by heart. Ask me to recite the lyrics- well I'd be glad to.

I'm slightly concerned about the fact that Michael's death is getting more publicity than Farrah's... I feel quite bad for her actually. They both passed away, on the same day. Why should one of them get more publicity then the other? Sure, Farrah wasn't as famous but she's still a human, who unfortunately lost a battle to Cancer.

I am equally saddened by both deaths, and will always respect those two individuals. Farrah really was beautiful, and what seemed like an angel. I always loved watching Charlies Angels Re-Runs when I was a kid, and I was overjoyed when they made movies =)

Rest in Peace Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett!

Over all, my favorite thing Farrah was in was most definitely the Charlies Angels television show, most definitely. I still watch re-runs this day.

xoxo
Jess

Awesome Facebook Name(s)

Yesterday on Facebook, I was really bored and annoyed with the name "Jessica Bamaramaboomboom" because I thought it was too long... so I went ahead and started thinking about Michael Jackson, and his song Billie Jean, which of course I grew up listening to!

It didn't work at first, but I let it sit for awhile... still wasn't going through. (I'm not very patient..) so I went onto my private account, and changed my name to Billie Jean. When I came on Facebook today, to my surprise it worked- on both accounts! Shit! I thought to myself, it was going to confuse a lot of people- which it is.

I think it's pretty cool, and at one point on the whole 'alternate name' thing, I changed it to MichaelJacksons Luffer which made it go in brackets beside Billie Jean, I thought it was suitable for the name, but Camilla just told me to grow up. =)

Then, I changed it to Ineedto Growup which I think I'll keep it that way, because whenever I add people that's what it will show up as.... interesting, right? So people better know my face, or else you'll be very confused!

xoxo
Billie Jean

Twitter

Does anyone know that I have a Twitter? Yes, lots of people know because I have over 250 followers but still- just advertising it once again. =)

I'm barely on it, but it feels good having lots of followers, plus I follow everyone that follows me, that's just the way that it works.

http://www.twitter.com/jessiimaay is where my Twitter is, oh yes. I used to be obsessed with the name "Jessii Maay" for myself- no exact clue why, but whatever that's just the way I am. I know you can change your Twitter name, but I like it, it's unique... I think.

xoxo
Jess

Why?

I'm curious why I have such bad luck, why all the bullshit happens to me, am I bad luck or something? Or am I just a bad person? I don't get why things happen the way they do, why things get out of control, it doesn't make sense to me. Why am I still here? What's keeping me alive? What would I end up like if I didn't have amazing family & friends? Who knows, I'd probably be a hooker. Life is just one question; why? For me, at least.

Shopping!

Everyone knows the West Edmonton mall is huge, right? Well I went there today of course, more shopping! I went to Aldo, American Eagle, American Apparel, Abercrombie, all that stuff. It was SO fun, SO fun.

I came out with like hundreds of bags, I can NOT leave a store without buying something, I'm that bad- really. I bought tons of stuff, I don't know where everythings going to fit because I do not throw things away.. like seriously I have clothes from 10th grade in my closet... well in Jacksonville. Not for long though, when the house sells my mom says "Jessica, unless you're taking this shit to Los Angeles, I'm chucking it out." Well jeez, thanks you ray of sunshine. :]

My addiction is sad, it's worse than my love for partying and drinking- and worse than my sick mind. It's that bad. I wont mention how much I spent- that'd be terrible, but take a guess, it'll be probably more than your guess.

I went to the fucking Apple Store- and came out with something. Like God, I have two laptops and a Mac computer already, Jesus I'm terrible. I bought...wait for it wait for it... a new cord for my iPod. My sisters cat chewed it, God Damnit.

xoxo
Jess

Quick Trip To Edmonton!

At complete last minute, Camilla decided "Hey! I want to go visit Joe in Edmonton, just to surprise him." over Facebook, and then I practically invited myself, and then she asked me, woot. I thought this was a joke, but no I really went back to Canada after leaving it that very same day, I think I travel almost as much as the Jolie-Pitts!

I for some twisted reason have a private jet in my family, which remains in Los Angeles. Thank God my pilot was available that night, or else we would have been stuck on a like 5 hour flight with other people! *Scream*!

Camilla discovered my edible soap in the bathroom- oh yes there's such thing. My mom found it somewhere in South America or something, I don't really listen to her that much. All I know is that she's an amazing woman, and without her I wouldn't be here. Love you Mommy! =) Total randomness, but whatever.

Then, Cami also thought she was hearing my beloved dog, Budda barking in the bedroom! It freaked me out too, but then I remembered it was just the same type of dog, but my pilots. That's cool- I guess. I don't mind it.

Anyway, did people who don't live in Canada know that there's only a one hour time difference between Los Angeles and Edmonton? Haha. Random fact of the day, I didn't know that until going there for the fourth time yesterday, I guess I was on Los Angeles time every other time I went there- whoops.

xoxo
Jess

I'm So Excited

Nobody except a few know how I'm obsessed with the Jonas Brothers (oh how they amuse me,) =) but now everyone does- so great. I love them all, so don't ask me to choose favorites, that's just mean. Kevin, Joe, and Nick- I love you. Nick, when you're 18, we're getting married.

On July 9th, I'm flying to Chicago, meeting up with Danii, and on the 10th, Jonas Brothers Concert! I'm so excited, my sister called me yesterday and told me she went to their concert in Vancouver, and that it was amazing but to be prepared to cry? I won't spread any details, because I don't have any except for the fact that it's good.

Excited excited excited! I'll probably still be hungover though- my birthday is on the 6th. =)

xoxo
Jess

Happy Canada Day!

It's July 1st, and all over Canada families are celebrating Canada Day, because well today is Canada Day. I make so much sense, right? Anyway, my point is, is that today is Canada Day and I'm in Toronto, which is in Ontario for you dumb asses which is obviously in Canada.

I'm not bored- because my sister, Courtney came with me, and a couple of my friends, and plus I'm here on work, which makes it funner because we like to get wasted and show up at work hungover, they give us excellent hangover treatments.

I just arrived awhile ago, and I've been celebrating Canada Day (soberly,) today. Fun fun, lots of kids, oh joy. ;)

xoxo
Jess

Where Have I Been?

Where have I been out of California, that'll stay unknown. Oh yes, I'm doing a little Gossip Girl here- except everyone knows me. Shit.

Hint hint: NOT Jacksonville. See? Sneaky. Out of California, completely. In the USA, but out of Los Angeles 'n stuff.

I was only there for an overnight trip, real fun stuff. They're fun, used to do them all the time with my mom and sisters, we'd just drive away somewhere, or fly high like birds and Bob Marley.

:)

xoxo
Jess

Sorry Camilla<3

I came home early this morning from an out of California trip for a day and a half- and my sister Courtney's dog Skittles was here, who I'd totally forgotten about. After I noticed that Skittles was doing, I was screaming "Get the hell away from those! NO!" because they were Cami's clothes, and well Skittles was kind of well humping them.

Afterward, I heard my dog, Budda growling. I went into the room and checked, and noticed Skittles had thrown up on Camilla's clothes. Not good! They're expensive clothes, that are not mine. Stupid stupid dog, stupid dog. Courtney will obviously be the paying one, not my deal. Call me a bitch, not like I've never heard it before. ;)

So, sorry Camilla Belle Routh for your expensive clothes (including a Marc Jacobs bag,) being thrown up on... I'll give you $500 dollars for the bag, because um well my cat scratched it, and well yeah..

:)

xoxo
Jess

Relationships Suck

Around three weeks ago, I went back to my hometown of Jacksonville, Florida for a nice family visit. My friend Sam, who's had a crush on me forever (since Grade 3!) planned a date for us- which I was not too excited for. I said "I just got dumped," but he pushed it- big time.

So, he takes me to a beach and I was so telling him that this was being friends- no father than that, but what he did was so sweet, he got all my friends who were in Jacksonville that day there too :) I was in shock, I hadn't seen most of them since I graduated in 2005!

We were hanging out, and then my high school boyfriend came and talked to me, we were high school sweethearts. We only broke up because of modeling and I moved away, which is the same reason I broke up with my ex-fiancee and then boyfriend Connor (well we were together in LA,) because both of our jobs were starting out.

ANYWAY, they're both the biggest douche bags ever, fuck them all. Jake and I were together for three weeks, and today he drops the big douche bomb of "I've got to work all over the world for three months, 'babe' sorry it just won't work." well SCREW YOU you could've told me that a LOT earlier, asshole.

So now my message to you Jake Lan is this;

Go sit in a hole, screw a blow up dummy, and die. THANKS!

:D

xoxo
Jess

I'm SO Bored

The only reason I made this blog was for me- I think. Not really, my friend Daniela said I should make one and that she does it for fun. Whatever major l to the o to the OSER!

There's a 98% chance that I'll never use this again, and a 2% chance that I will use this again, who knows. I've never ever ever blogged before. Blegh.

---By the way, like the name? I thought I wouldn't be allowed to use it since some websites are careful about swearing, but it's allowed 'bitch' awesome for me right?

Well this is absolutely boring you now- so bye.

xoxo
Jess